DUSTYBEAR'S LAUGH TRACK
FUNZIES AND LAUGHS...
for the queer eye AND the straight guy
JESUS...
Have you met my Rottweiler friend Jesus. He loves to bite butt.
Religious and thrifty he ith too.
JESUS SAVES hith bones. Buries them next to the bodies in the back yard. Cute kid he.
ANYWAY...
Here is the skinny (Sit down Mary.
When it's your turn I'll call you).
I will make a statement and you fill in the blanks.
SUCH AS:
"There I wath, jest sitting around the cave minding my own business, when____________."
The idea is to supply answers that are INCREDIBLY WITTY. Or, you can just put in your usual crap. LOL.
Okay. Here is the funniest one since the invention of the fake pregnancy pillow for men, (electric vibrator, life-size blow-up doll of Justin Timberlake, the personalizable dart board {Enclose the photo of the victim}, the FAKE 2 ft penith, with directions on installation. Batteries are not included NOR recommended. UL is studying the issue. A coupon for a gallon of KY is included.)
DUSTYBEAR'S COCKTAIL CHATTER...For People You Don't Like
1) I really like standing next to you. Makes ME look SO much better.
2) Honey, that plastic surgeon SURE AS HELL has a sense of humor, don't he.
3) Gonna be LAST CALL pretty soon...and I am SO curious. If you're this ugly in the dark, I can't
WAIT to see you when the lights come on.
4) Hey, the Zoo just called. Your cage is done.
5) You know? I think you're the first woodland critter I've ever seen in this bar.
6) I'm curious. Besides your face, do you have any OTHER birth defects?
7) You used to fall out of your crib a lot, didnja swee'pea.
8) You oughta run for President. Hell, after ol' G Dubya, America NEEDS a good laugh.
9) If I had a dollar for everytime I heard someone say they liked you, I'd have to borrow money
for my next drink.
10) Oh my GOD! I forgot Halloween?
Oh wait...
COPYRIGHT 
2007 by
Dustybear
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