BEAR

BEAR
ALWAYS LOOKING FOR TROUBLE

DUSTYBEAR'S LAUGH TRACK

FUNZIES AND LAUGHS...
for the queer eye AND the straight guy

SHORTY IS...

350# WandaMae was walking down the street...behind a midget, when she suddenly sneezed... Causing a horrific backdraft. In trying to regain her balance, she snapped her legs together. THE PROBLEM: was it death by accident or...homicide? Further complicating the matter is the fact that the midget's corpse was smiling. SUICIDE, perhaps? THE TOMBSTONE READS: HERE LIES SHORTY... Y'ALL AIN'T GONNA BULEEEVE THIS SHIT.

JESUS...

Have you met my Rottweiler friend Jesus. He loves to bite butt.

Religious and thrifty he ith too.
JESUS SAVES hith bones. Buries them next to the bodies in the back yard. Cute kid he.

ANYWAY...

Here is the skinny
(Sit down Mary.
When it's your turn I'll call you).

I will make a statement and you fill in the blanks.

SUCH AS:

"There I wath, jest sitting around the cave minding my own business, when____________."

The idea is to supply answers that are INCREDIBLY WITTY. Or, you can just put in your usual crap. LOL.

Okay. Here is the funniest one since the invention of the fake pregnancy pillow for men, (electric vibrator, life-size blow-up doll of Justin Timberlake, the personalizable dart board {Enclose the photo of the victim}, the FAKE 2 ft penith, with directions on installation. Batteries are not included NOR recommended. UL is studying the issue. A coupon for a gallon of KY is included.)


Being Five Comics

MAUKE SEZ: A LAUGH A DAY KEEPS THE MICE AWAY...and he should know...

ALIENS...

Thursday, June 14, 2007

SAD SAD NEWS

Sad News :

Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community.

The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkie, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions. Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.

The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

If this made you smile for even a brief second, please rise to the occasion and take time to pass it on and share that smile with someone else that may be having a crumby day and kneads it.

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