At the ripe old age of 98, you can say whatever the heck you want...and get away with it. Even if it's to a Minister.
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Toward the end of a Sunday morning service recently, the Minister looked out across the congregation...and asked:
"How many of you have forgiven your enemies."
Eighty percent held up their hands.
The Minister then repeated the question he had just asked...and this time, every person raised their hand...EXCEPT...one rather tiny and very elderly lady.
"Mrs. Pendleton? Are you not willing to forgive your enemies? the Minister asked of her.
"I don't HAVE any," she replied...smiling sweetly.
"My GOODNESS Mrs. Pendleton. That is a most remarkable statement.
How old are you?"
"I was ninety-eight on my last birthday."
"Mrs. Pendleton. PLEASE. Would you come down front and tell all of us...just how a peson can live NINETY-EIGHT YEARS, and not have an enemy in the world," The Minister implored.
Dear old Mrs. Pendleton tottered her way down the aisle...and when she got down by the Minister, she turned and faced the congregation.
She stood quietly for a moment, and then...in a clear strong voice, said...
"Simple. I OUTLIVED THE SONS-OF-BITCHES."
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